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Oct. 2nd, 2009

Idyllwild

WANDERLUST

Have you been watching the PBS series on the National Parks? Ken Burns is a genius at the long, well thought out and visually stunning documentary (remember the series on jazz that he did? and the Civil War?)

The films are giving me serious wanderlust. I started thinking about which parks I’ve visited and which I’ve yet to see (too many of the latter, unfortunately). I’ve been to Sequoia and Kings Canyon, but not Yosemite; Death Valley and Joshua Tree; the Grand Canyon but not Bryce Canyon – or any of the wonderlands of Utah. I’ve been to Mesa Verde, Rocky Mountain, Carlsbad Caverns, the Petrified Forest, Denali and the Hawaiian Volcanoes.

And since I once had a snapshot of me by Old Faithful – a sidetrip on a journey back to my husband’s family in Ontario Canada, I must’ve been in Yellowstone, however briefly, though all I have to show for it is a hazy memory of waiting for the “show” and thinking it’d better be good (it was). The visit to inlaws had obviously traumatized me.

That leaves an awful lot of parks I have to put on my new Bucket List. What I’d love to be able to do is get hold of a VW Westphalia with the pop-top roof, load up the dogs and set out on the road. Some of my warmest memories of traveling are camping around Europe with three children in a VW camper.Hmm. I wonder if you can rent one?

I can at least hop over to Amazon.com and check out books on the parks – and dream.

Aug. 22nd, 2009

Enterprise

MY FICTION GOES TO SPACE

Thanks to Diane Turnshek, I've just learned that a short story of mine is aboard the International Space Station, part of the recreational reading library.

It's "Ceremony After a Raid," first published way back when Patrick Price was editing AMAZING STORIES. Here's the URL:

http://www.governmentattic.org/docs/ISS_Media_2008.pdf

Jul. 6th, 2009

me2

Update on Westercon

Phoenix was hot! (Well, duh.) The Mission Palms Hotel in Tempe (site of a recent Nebula Conference) has a very lovely pool, and that helped even though the mercury was already soaring by 7 am. I didn't step off the hotel grounds between arrival Thursday morning and departure Sunday afternoon.

It was a small Westercon, maybe less then 450 people, probably due to the economy tanking. But those that were there had a good time. One of my former fiction writing students, Dana Davis, came in to see me and show me her newly-published novel -- Yay, Dana! That always makes me happy. I sold a number of books that almost amounted to the sum US Airways extracted from my wallet in order to transport them, and I did a very fine panel on alien linguistics with Stan Schmidt and Juliette Wade on Sunday morning.

I met many writers I already knew, and made the acquaintance of others. One in particular, T. Jackson King, exchanged his collection of short stories, JUDGMENT DAY, for my lingster collection after a shared Reading session in which we basically read to each other. I've just started to read it, and I like what I've read so far.

July 4th evening I spent in the LASFS suite on the 4th floor which had a great view of a very long fireworks display put on by the city of Phoenix. Another former student, Christian McGuire (Con Chair for World Con in Anaheim a couple of years ago, and on staff for this one) assured me I really needed to come to LosCon this year. With all those fireworks going off in the background, how could I refuse?

Now back to the recalcitrant novella (novel? perish the thought!), energized by the linguistics panel!

Jun. 30th, 2009

Enterprise

NEW BLOG AT NEBULA AWARDS SITE

My latest musing on life and science fiction is up:

http://www.nebulaawards.com/index.php/guest_blogs/fantastic_voyages/

Jun. 8th, 2009

me

TEMECULA WINE & BALLOON FESTIVAL

I spent the weekend out in the Hemet Valley with family to celebrate a grandson's graduation and twelfth birthday. Saturday evening some of us went to Temecula for the annual wine-tasting and hot-air balloon festival. The web site advertised the entry price as $5; at the gate they demanded $22 per person. Since we were arriving at 8pm, just before the balloon glow and about an hour before the festival closed down,we thought that was outrageous. Luckily, a young friend who was volunteering with the balloons all weekend scored us some free passes.

Then, once inside, we learned they were shutting down the wine-tasting in about five minutes, and they refused to sell any more vouchers. As these would have cost another outrageous amount of money in any case, we came up with our own solution. We bought a couple of hand-decorated wine glasses at an artist's booth and took those to the winery stalls. I was much happier supporting an artist than feeding a greedy festival committee's coffers.

The "glow" was beautiful to see! I'd hoped to go up in a balloon this weekend, but the weather didn't cooperate -- overcast, blustery, with the threat of occasional thunderstorms. Later this summer, definitely!

Mar. 13th, 2009

K2

THE WAY TO PEACE

Browsing in the bookstore for something to read, I picked up THREE CUPS OF TEA by Greg Mortenson and David Oliver Relin. I'd heard people talking about it, but thought it was going to be another of those lesser stories about Iraq or Iran or Afghanistan published after KITERUNNER became popular. I was mistaken.

In a kind of “as told to” fashion, this is the story of a climber who failed to make it to the top of his goal, K2 in the Himalayas, but by doing so found another more powerful goal for his life – building schools for girls in forgotten villages in the poorest parts of Pakistan, and later, Afghanistan.

But it's more than a tale of bringing schools to the world's poorest citizens. It's also about the fact that the only sure way to counteract terrorism and bring peace to the world is through education. Mortenson's insights into the how and why of the madrassas' teaching of radical Islam scared me – as it should scare all of us. Unfortunately we've spent the last eight years fueling the fires of hatred against us. This well written, absorbing book shows us a glimmer of hope of what can be accomplished by ordinary people meeting and helping other ordinary people, sowing peace country by country.

Highly recommended reading!

Jan. 24th, 2009

me

TASHI DELEG!

Eight o’clock this morning – cloudy and raining. But the greys have to go out. One of the biggest inconveniences of living in a condo (and maybe the only true one) is that you can’t just open the door and shoo the dogs outside. So I dragged on clothes and shoes and we went out.

It wasn’t so bad really. The air was fresh and cool and the dogs enjoyed all the new scents we encountered by taking a different route. And actually, it wasn’t raining so much as misting. But, being only human, I grumbled about rain on my glasses (I like to wear transition lenses when I’m out in the bright light) and the time it was taking as the dogs stopped again and again to read the doggie news.

At one point, we passed a red-robed monk from the Tibetan Buddhist temple not far from where I live. I did my best imitation of an all-purpose reverent bow (learned from my Tai Chi master), hands on top of each other, brief head nod, difficult with two leashes in my hands, and on we went. We probably did a mile and a half today, far from our record, and had turned the last corner on the homeward stretch. And there was our monk again, almost back to his temple.

This time I dredged up the Tibetan greeting I’d learned in Lhasa. “Tashi Deleg!” I said as we passed each other. “Oh! Tashi deleg!” he said, looking surprised. And his face opened in a big smile.

Coming into our warm condo, I agreed with the dogs. That walk was a nice way to start the day.

Jan. 19th, 2009

Catalina

ISLANDS

What is the allure of islands?

I was pricked by this question this morning as the greyhounds and I stood on the Long Beach bluffs and looked seaward. The skies were clear except for a few puffy clouds, the view sharp as crystal to the southern horizon* which seemed to mark the place where everything stops, the absolute edge of the planet. No wonder that in earlier times they believed ships that crossed that line were falling off the world. And there, rising up on the edge, was the distinctive shape of Santa Catalina Island.

“Twenty-six miles across the sea...” the Four Preps sang in 1958, celebrating the allure of Catalina as it's usually called. Not a very wide channel; ferries and sailboats cross it all the time. It's even been swum – more than once – giving the swimmers the chance of eye to eye contact with pods of migrating grey whales, or the resident friendly dolphins. The island itself is still mostly unspoiled; the threat of over-development is kept in hand by the absence of fresh water sources.

But to experience the real tug-at-the-heart of Catalina, you need to stand on the mainland beach at sunset – particularly in the winter when the sky flames red and purple in the west – and look across the darkening water at that silhouette on the edge of the world. All the magical stories of islands – Odysseus in the Greek islands, pirates in the Caribbean, Gauguin sailing to Tahiti, Darwin on Galapagos – will flood your heart. You'll find yourself overwhelmed by yearning to go there.

I don't know that I can answer the question I began with; I can only affirm its power for me. But maybe that's because I was born on a small island which itself attracted wave after wave of people from the continent, drawn by its allure on the western horizon.


[*I should explain that Long Beach, on the west coast, has a south-facing beach.]

Oct. 6th, 2008

Idyllwild

ART, WINE, & WET WEATHER

Every year, on the first Saturday in October, the little village of Idyllwild, in the San Jacinto Mountains of California, puts on an Art Walk/Wine Tasting event. It's a lot of fun to go to, and I've attended seven, counting by the glasses in my cupboard. You pay a fee – this year it was $25 – and you get a pretty wine glass which you carry up and down the road to the different galleries, gathering samples at each stop. A lot of very fine wineries based in Temecula come up to pour their wines, and there's always food, cheese and crackers and fruit, and usually live music too. This is where I first tasted Barefoot wines, a favorite of mine now. A trolley runs along the route if you need it. This year we were a party of six people and had five dogs along with us, and we couldn't have used it if we'd needed it (we didn't). One year, they had a horse-drawn trolley which was a great attraction for the children who'd come along with their parents.

I enjoy this event, and usually browse the galleries and craft stalls looking for unusual Christmas gifts. Idyllwild is an arts community, with a thriving culture of artists of many kinds, and an internationally known, private arts high school where I taught creative writing for several summer camps. Since I have a small cabin just outside Idyllwild, I often come up to the mountains during the year, but the Art event has to be one of the best occasions of the year.

Making this even more special was the fact that my oldest granddaughter had invited her just-found birth-father to meet the family and enjoy the village scene. I am so happy for her: this is something she's always longed to do, and he seems overjoyed to get to know the daughter he never knew he had. As if the wine itself wasn't enough, this was pretty heady stuff!

The only negative thing was that it rained, not hard at first, but enough to soak through my sweatshirt to my t-shirt. We had umbrellas, but they were in the car. The dogs put up with it just as we did, which is to say not without some complaining. I think that the weather must have affected the number of visitors because the crowd didn't seem as dense this time as in other years. That's not good for the artists and craftspeople. We bought three kinds of bread at a bakery and left a bit early to go down to my daughter's house at the foot of the mountains. There we were joined by another daughter and her family, eager to meet my granddaughter's “New Dad,” and we had a great barbecue (It wasn't raining down there, of course).

Now I have to find where in Long Beach I can get bottles of the port wine I fell in love with this time!

Jul. 23rd, 2008

me

"WHAT I DID ON MY SUMMER VACATION."

Although breaking one's foot right before going on holiday is an inarguably stupid move, I'm here to tell you it doesn't have to dampen the fun or the experience. I just got back from a week in Southern Oregon – me, the boot and the crutches.

I flew in to Portland and met a friend from my Rwanda trip last year, a doctor as it turns out, but a radiologist not an orthopedist. Good job too, as I get a trifle testy when people try to baby me too much with good advice and helpful hands. We rented a car at an exorbitant rate and drove down the coast to see the dunes. My friend wanted to see them. As for me, I once lived within shouting distance of the dunes at Pismo Beach and Arroyo Grande on California's central coast, and once you've seen one dune –  Besides, the boot doesn't do sand well.Then we continued down through Eugene and Medford to Ashland where we stayed at a B&B and enjoyed the Shakespeare Festival.

We saw four plays in three days. The first was Othello which was performed outdoors in the Old Globe replica (not a close one; the one on Bankside in London is better). It was well done, but Othello had a tendency to go over the top – which you can blame on the Bard because the language is right there in the play itself. In reality, this is Iago's play anyway; I've always thought the play should be called “Iago” not “Othello” as the villain is the central character and Othello is sort of a one-note. Iago-the-actor was very good in this production.

Then we saw a new play, Breakfast, Lunch and Dinner, in a small theater where the audience sat on two sides of an elongated stage. Magic realism best describes this one, performed by only four cast members, about a woman who can't keep from gaining weight and eventually floats away. (Literally. Quite spectacular.) It was funny, thought-provoking, and eventually enigmatic. Afterwards, there was a chance for the audience to talk with one of the members of the cast which proved interesting but not illuminating. (Hey – he was an actor, not a critic.)

Back to the open-air theater for Our Town which was the weakest of the four. I think this one doesn't age well, no matter how well-acted or nattily staged. Its themes of small town lives and small town loves that are going to end up in the grave have all been done too many times now. There's no freshness left in the message.

But the peak experience for us came in the small theater which now was set for an in-the-round performance of Coriolanus in modern dress. I'd been dreading seeing that as I'm a purist when it comes to Shakespeare. Besides, I'd seen Richard Burton perform the role on the stage of the Old Vic at least three times (I had a schoolgirl crush on Burton).  This was a “military” performance, complete with advanced weaponry and camouflage fatigues. The people's tribunes carried laptops and got their news over cell phones. The common herd of people carried shopping bags and picket signs. Coriolanus (who looked stunning in military skivvies -- Be still my heart!) was essentially an honor-and-duty-bound career marine. It was a triumph all round. After seeing it, I realized that the theme it embodies of duty and betrayal made absolute sense to me for the first time.

From the sublime to the piscatorial: After Ashland we returned to Portland and drove up to the Bonneville Dam on the Columbia to see fish hatcheries and fish ladders. And then home.The foot held up well, though it's tiring schlepping the extra weight of the boot around. With luck, I'll be out of it in time for the Worldcon trip to Denver.

Jun. 2nd, 2008

me

FOUND MONEY -- GONE AGAIN

My tax refund just landed in my bank account. Can the economic stimulus check be far behind? The refund was a paltry couple of hundred dollars, but still, better than nothing. This time of year I'm faced with a lot of expenditures for family birthdays, and this month I have a gift to buy for a 21st (my oldest granddaughter), and a high school graduation gift for my oldest grandson who'll be off to the University of Oregon in the Fall. By the time I've contributed to the party for the newly minted adult and written the check for the graduate, I still have another graduation – granddaughter moving from junior to senior high –  and two more grandsons celebrating birthdays before the month is over.

What's a grandmother to do, especially if she's retired?

But I need that stimulus check to pay for a planned vacation at the Shakespeare Festival in Ashland, Oregon, next month! I'm meeting up with a new friend that I made on the trip to Rwanda; she lives in Chicago, and it was her idea. I'm looking forward to the week. I have frequent flyer miles for the journey, and one free night at a Marriott in Portland, but that leaves the tickets for the four plays we're going to see, and the bed-and-breakfast in Ashland for three nights, plus the rental car, gasoline (horrors!), and two more nights on the road. 

Obviously, the check should go towards the vacation (Bush would be pleased). But I have a stack of bills to pay too – in addition to the family celebration ones – and my creditors are looking forward to sharing my new-found wealth. Sigh. I think I'll just charge everything to my Visa card, then pay as much off as I can when the check comes in, and fudge what part of the money went to pay off which expense.

Anybody got any better ideas? What are you going to do with your stimulus check?

May. 15th, 2008

me

THE RETURN OF TYPHOID MARY

I'm beginning to think that I'm some kind of jinx, bringing down disaster on the places around the world I've recently visited. I won't count Rwanda, because their troubles had all happened before I got there. But how do you explain Kenya – that relatively democratic, reasonably well-governed nation – erupting in civil unrest just a few weeks after I visited? And how about Tibet? Certainly, I was there over a year before the normally peaceful monks started rebelling and people were getting themselves manhandled or worse on the streets of Lhasa.

And now we have Sichuan Province in trouble.

Nitpickers and other detail-oriented folk will no doubt point out that two of the previously mentioned disasters were man-made, but that an earthquake is An Act of God (or Mother Nature, if you prefer). But we can't dismiss the fact that I was there in Sichuan. And – worse news for all you Nature Conservancy folk, or members of the WWF or PETA – I visited the Wolong Panda Reserve while I was in Chengdu. (Luckily, reports say the pandas are okay, all eighty adults and assorted cubs, along with their human staff, just a trifle shaken up.)

Coincidence? I don't think so!

Apr. 27th, 2008

book cover

Update on LA Times Festival of Books

Three words for it: Hot. Crowded. Overwhelming.

Hats, water bottles and sun screen were necessities of life as the mercury went way over 90. Vendors selling water, lemonade and ice-cream – they were everywhere – probably made tidy sums. I don't know what the official count is, but it seemed as if all of Los Angeles came to the grounds of UCLA on Saturday, the day I was there. Were they buying books or just gawking at sweating writers touting them? I don't know. People seemed to be toting book bags stuffed with something or other. I hope it was books! You needed tickets to get into some of the panel discussions and special presentations; I didn't try this year.

There were lots of parents pushing kids in strollers or carrying them in backpacks (In this hot weather? Ouch!)  And lots of face-painted kids and panting dogs. That seems like a happy omen to me. Future readers! Pet lovers! Memo to self: Put more dogs and kids into the stories I write.

The three-sided canvas booths for vendors seemed hotter than outside, especially if you stood under the trees. UCLA has a lovely, well-landscaped campus, and I enjoyed strolling around before my stint and after – until the sun became too much and a headache drove me home. I spent a quarter at UCLA years ago on a post-graduate fellowship, and it feels like my west coast alma mater. But it's huge, and even if you manage to park near the booth you're signing in at the beginning of the day, you can guarantee it will be the furthest away from you after you've finished browsing around at the end of the day.

The people who hosted me, the Greater Los Angeles Writers Society, were nice enough to improve on the lame PR poster I'd provided ahead of time, and they kept me supplied with cold water. I sold half a dozen books in an hour and a half. And I got to talk to a lot of neat people, including a couple of my former students, one whom I hadn't seen in years. But it seemed like there were four people who wanted to talk about their own writing ambitions for every one who was interested in buying a book.

So was it worth it? I guess so. Since it's the biggest book festival on the west coast, it's easy for a midlist genre writer to get lost. The energy of the festival was uplifting – and if I hadn't been there I'd have probably been at home grousing about the heat and getting very little done anyway.

Whar's your experience of events like this?

Mar. 21st, 2008

me

GOOD FRIDAY THOUGHTS ON TIBET

I haven't written about Tibet before, though it's been weighing heavy on my mind these last few days. Seeing the photos of bleeding monks lying in the streets of the Barkhor is a painful experience. I was there, a couple of years ago, with a People to People delegation in that very spot.

We had just finished the long climb up to visit the Potala, the Dalai Lama's palace, and the day was warm though it was late October. From the top, you can see for miles in clear blue air across the Roof of the World, and you find yourself thinking about that scene in Seven Years in Tibet when the boy who plays the young Dalai Lama looks through the telescope and sees Brad Pitt approaching. Everything you thought you knew about Lhasa after seeing that film is true: the monks still chant inside the monasteries; the prayer flags flutter, strung across the streets and alleyways; pilgrims spin the prayer wheels or crawl on hands and knees toward the Jokhang, sacred temple; the smoke from yak butter candles is rancid in the Potala; the rats run unmolested across the golden face of the Buddha smiling benignly on supplicants.

The Barkhor, where the carnage is now taking place, is the old marketplace, the heart of traditional Lhasa, and as such not obviously touched by the creeping invasion of Chinese settlers and Chinese merchants. Old shops selling gold-decorated mandalas and silver jewelry and decorative prayer bells jostle with stalls steaming with roasting yak meat and shops that offer you tea with a dollop of yak butter. The yak supplies everything in Tibet, meat, milk, butter, cheese, hide and hair. Even the bones get recycled into beads hawked by the dark-eyed women with giggling children hanging onto their skirts in the Barkhor. Barefoot monks go smiling by, nodding at the tourists with their cameras and their fists full of dollars to buy trinkets or give alms.

“These people look like my people!” my companion, a Navajo, commented, often moved instinctively to reply in Navajo when a toothless old man or a woman offering bone necklaces for sale spoke to her in Tibetan. In my turn, I'd stumble over pronouncing tashi deli, hello.

In the Barkhor it's easy to forget that the Chinese have relentlessly been moving ethnic Han Chinese into Tibet for a long time now. You don't see the shop signs that are elsewhere in the city, Chinese letters looming large, English names next, and Tibetan smallest for each shop, shop after shop down the long parade of new buildings, houses and businesses for the new immigrants.

“Don't mention the Dalai Lama in the Potala!” our Tibetan guide warned, for the Chinese had spies listening even two years ago.

Tibet is a magical land with snow-capped Himalayas towering over sacred lakes, and red-cheeked children leading Tibetan mastiffs as big as small bears along winding mountain roads. It's enough to make you remember all the legends of Shangri-La. You can't visit Tibet without leaving part of your heart behind. But the sadness beneath the calm Buddhist surface was real even then. The knowledge of carnage to come lurked in the shadow of people's eyes.

I can't look at my photo album without tears blurring the pictures of monks and children and patient yaks. It seems appropriate somehow to think of Tibet now, especially on Good Friday when we remember how inhumanely humans can act towards each other.

Feb. 25th, 2008

me

WHAT'S ON YOUR BUCKET LIST?

I didn't watch the Academy Awards last night, mostly because I've only seen one of the nominees – and that one I didn't like. (See “Dirty Tricks” here). Apart from that one, I've only seen two other movies recently. One was the Hannah Montana concert movie in 3D to which I  took my six year-old granddaughter. (It reminded me of her mother and aunts at that age, crazy about Donny and Marie.) The other one was The Bucket List which was pretty well ignored last night.

I'm not a great fan of movie comedies, but I much prefer them to the current crop of blood and gloom movies that Hollywood has been serving us. I don't think I have an atrophied comedy bone, though the trouble may be that I like old Brit comedies on PBS, Are You Being Served, and Keeping Up Appearances, or Dame Judi Dench in As Time Goes By, and that prejudices me against the simply silly stuff that seems to fill the big screen these days. Roger Ebert didn't like The Bucket List, finding it sentimental, and I usually agree with him 90% of the time. But I wanted something light one afternoon, so I took a chance on Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman.

I can tell you right away what's wrong with the movie: It's that darned voice-over stuff. As far as I can see, that's a blatant attempt to make the movie “relevant” in some psychological way, and it doesn't work. Take away the solemn pontifications Freeman's character is forced to make, and you have a sweetly funny piece of fluff, a boys' road trip comedy that has its roots in the things Crosby, Hope and Lamour used to do way back in the forties and fifties last century, a genre that has produced many charming movies, including the variation, Thelma and Louise.

The theme of The Bucket List, as I'm sure everybody knows by now, is the things we've always dreamed of doing before we die, but have mostly not got around to doing. And that got me to thinking. What are the things I've always wanted to do but keep on putting off?

I'm pretty good at taking chances and going for the unusual. I've taken flying lessons in a sailplane; I've sailed a twenty-footer single-handed in rough water in the Catalina Channel when my “crew” passed out drunk; I've gone off-roading in the Mojave in a Jeep; I've seen the bats streaming out of the Carlsbad Caverns at twilight; I've taken part in an Ojibwe sweatlodge ceremony in Wisconsin. I've been to the top of the Empire State Building and to Ground Zero; I've walked on the Great Wall of China, and I've explored the Potala in Lhasa; I've petted kangaroos and koala bears in Australia; I've camped across most of Europe; I've ridden a gondola in Venice, taken a steamer through the  Norwegian fjords and the train from London to Paris via the chunnel. I've climbed to the top of a volcano in Hawai'i; I've celebrated Oktoberfest in Munich, walked among the Greek ruins, gone on safari in Kenya and danced with the Masai. I've crossed the Equator and been to the Arctic Circle. I've visited the Grand Canyon in Arizona and Copper Canyon in Mexico. I've seen Michelangelo's David in Florence, and Van Gogh's “Starry Night” in New York. And that's only the things I can name off the top of my head. Not a bad list for someone who could've lost her life in the bombing of London when she was a child!

So what's left on my bucket list? Oh, there are places in the world I'd still like to go: India, for instance, and Egypt. The pyramids in South America attract me too. And I'd love to go up in a hot air balloon. (But no parachute jumps for me!) But the thing I really would love to do is go into space. I won't hold out for a Moon landing – though that would be nice – but a quick trip up to where the sky turns from blue to black and the stars don't twinkle any more and my body becomes weightless, now that's an item that's top of the list!

What's on your bucket list?

Jan. 6th, 2008

me

HEILIGE DREI KOENIGE

[Or: Happy Epiphany!]

 When we lived in Bavaria in the early seventies, this day was almost a bigger deal than Christmas itself. Being a predominantly Roman Catholic state, Bavaria tended to celebrate Christmas as the religious holiday it was first intended to be. Everybody, it seemed, went to church; the more devout among our neighbors put off the drunken revelry until the feast day of the Three Kings' visit to the Christ child. And since those eminences came bearing goodies, it was logical that their day be celebrated by the exchange of gifts.

Of course, I knew that in England in the “Old Days” December 24th was for going around the neighborhood singing Christmas carols (and being served portions of “figgy pudding” or even small mince pies as a reward, or tossed a few coins to just go away). December 25th was for going to church, and December 26th, or Boxing Day, was for giving out the Christmas “boxes” or tips to servants, tradespeople and those who worked for us, and I suppose that included toys for the kids too. My extended family in London wisely conflated all of this into a roaring, two-day party, overflowing with music, gifts, food and drink. (I've often thought that the excesses of those days after World War II were in direct response to the austerity of previous Christmases spent mainly in bomb shelters.)

But back to Bavaria. What I most remember about Heilige Drei Koenige Day was that the preferred fowl was goose. The only time I'd had goose before that was in England – a Christmas just after the war – when a great-aunt brought a goose and real, fresh churned butter up from the country. To my child's palate, they were both horrible, the butter because I was accustomed to the wartime orange glop of “National Butter” -- a concoction of 99 % margarine and 1% butter – and the goose because it was dripping with oil.

Ah, but if you have a good German cook teach you how to roast a goose, it doesn't have to be oily at all! The secret is to cook the goose uncovered in the oven (and unstuffed), and to prick it with a fork at regular intervals so that the oil runs out into the pan under the rack on which the goose sits. Sprinkling the skin with ice water towards the end of the cooking time helps to make the skin crisp and flavorful. The result, served with tart apple sauce, is yummy. (It also helps, my German teacher told me, if the goose has been bred for the table and fed accordingly, not allowed to wander around the barnyard picking up scraps of fish from the pond. Goose, like duck, has a tendency to remind the eater of the bird's last meal.) But alas, there aren't any leftovers with goose for next-day sandwiches, and boiling the carcass for soup as you can do with a turkey doesn't work either.

Now I'm feeling hungry! I'm going out for dinner with my cousin's family tonight. I don't know where we'll be eating, but I'll keep my fingers crossed that roast goose will magically appear on the menu. That would be appropriate.  At the very least, we ought to head for a middle-Eastern restaurant and feast like the Three Kings on their day.

Sep. 26th, 2007

me

WHEN THERE'S ONLY ONE ROAD OUT OF HELL: RWANDA, 2007

Of course, I'd read about the genocide in those dark months of 1994, when neighbor turned against neighbor and the machine gun and the machete reigned  in the rolling green hills of Rwanda. And I knew about the shameful record of the UN and the major powers – including Bill Clinton – who stood by and let the tide of blood engulf cities and villages until one million people were slaughtered, three million sent into exile, and three hundred thousand children became orphans. But I'd been to the Holocaust Museum in Los Angeles, and I'd lived for two years in Dachau and visited the melancholy sites. And I'd read about Pol Pot and Stalin and all their murderous kin around the globe and throughout time. So when People-to-People invited me to join a one-week mission in understanding to Rwanda, I decided I could handle the sadness visiting the scene would surely cause.

President Dwight Eisenhower founded People-to-People in 1956, to promote understanding and friendships between ordinary citizens as a way to lessen the hold violence and war have on the planet. I'd traveled with these citizen ambassadors before to China and Tibet, and I'd found their intelligent mix of visits to  schools, hospitals, universities, orphanages, farms, artists' cooperatives, combined with conversations with diplomats and professionals working in the country, both American and native, appealed to my brain as well as my heart.( I've never been happy sitting in a tour bus and seeing a country a day.) Come and see for yourself the rebuilding of a nation, People-to-People's invitation said.

Rwanda surprised me on both counts. The hotels in capital city Kigali and on the shores of Lake Kivu are modern, easily four-star, with eager if not always prepared staff. In sheer beauty of the hilly countryside it resembles Switzerland but with eucalyptus and bamboo in place of pine and fir. The intense work that's going into reconciliation and healing, the frenzied rebuilding of infrastructure, the overall optimism and warm friendliness of the people is impressive. And the dark shadows cast by the genocide that still linger were far more wrenching of my emotions than I could've anticipated.

Faced with the physical and emotional devastation left by the genocide, not to mention over 120,000 suspected of being perpetrators crowded in prison, the government realized it was time for unusual methods of tackling the problems and making sure the horror never happened again. The first problem was to take care of a population's physical needs for food and shelter. The countryside, poor to begin with, had been devastated, homes and farmlands laid waste, even much of the wildlife fled from the chaos. (Later, in Kenya, a wildlife guide told us that chimpanzees had streamed across the borders to find sanctuary in Rwanda's neighboring countries.) Only the scavenger birds had it good, feasting on corpses that littered streets and fields; when I commented on the size of some ravens we saw in one village, our guide commented wryly the birds weren't as big as they had been a few years ago. The keys to a better future were education and the elimination of poverty, major players in the climate of hatred that led to the genocide.

Primary goals were to build housing for everybody including returning exiles, give everyone a small (by our standards) plot of land on which to grow food, maybe a couple of goats that were kept tethered in dirt yards and by the roadsides, encourage the growth of tea bushes on neatly terraced hillsides, and the founding of craft coops to market a few baskets or carvings or handwoven garments to help supplement the diet of homegrown  vegetables and occasional meat when the goats were too old to give milk. Rwanda is a very small country; as a visitor from a Western state, driving through the countryside on the way to visit an orphanage, I was struck by how little empty space  there was. Outside of Kigali, the land is parceled out into tiny green squares of potatoes, maize, beans and spinach, interspersed with small banana plantations, for family consumption; the ubiquitous hills are terraced to grow tea, Rwanda's major export after coffee. These were not huge holdings as I might've seen out west, but communal efforts to raise a few cash crops to send to market. The houses were tiny, one-room affairs of wood and the adobe-like red clay, few having more than dirt floors. Smoke from cooking fires exited through the roof rather than through a chimney, serving to kill the insect life that swarmed in the thatch. Plumbing was often a hole in the ground, surrounded by stones to keep one's feet out of the mud, running water a luxury that will have to wait a while in most places. Barefoot children tend the goats or sit by the roadside and wave enthusiastically to the new sensation: foreign visitors! Women hawk honey poured into recycled bottles of South African liqueur they obviously never had the money to taste, and eggs bound up in beautiful palm leaf baskets. These are surely among the poorest in the world, yet they are hospitable, anxious to share a skewer of barbecued goat meat, a roasted potato, a mug of banana beer with visitors, proud to display their dances and their crafts. They don't beg from tourists, though they are grateful when we leave behind items of clothing to make room in our suitcases for souvenirs.

The schoolrooms seem dark and bare to western ideas of educational environments, lacking maps and books, and the pupils were grateful for our gifts of crayons, colored pencils and soccer balls. It's not uncommon to find a ratio of forty children to one teacher. But I did see old Apple computers from the early eighties still chugging along, and the children are all learning English – mandated by the government for everybody as a second language in place of French. “Give me my pencil!” the children chanted, hands outstretched, as soon as they escaped the watchful eyes of their teachers. (I suppose it's their version of “la plume de ma tante” that English-speaking children learn when first tackling French.) Since they hadn't mastered much more, and I knew no Rwandese beyond “hello” and “thank you,” I mustered up some French to reply which invariably sent them into fits of giggles. A doctor at a small medical clinic far from the capital city told of the lack of equipment, the shortage of drugs, the prevalence of AIDS in the female population (deliberately induced through rape by the perpetrators of genocide),  the difficulty of instilling modern practices of hygiene into his patients. The dying lack palliative drugs to ease their pain, but he was proud to have made childbirth safer for mothers and reduced infant mortality rates. At the university, the professors said, “Send us people to train our people!” The generation of intellectuals that are so badly needed to help the country rebuild and advance in the modern world was wiped out in the genocide.

But you can't escape the hopeful mood that permeates everyone and everything. This is a country that is committed to healing its wounds and moving forward because it really doesn't have any other options.

The wounds, on the other hand, are grievous.

Several days into the mission, after giving us enough time to see all the hopeful signs – and perhaps inoculating us against despair -- the organizers took us for a history lesson at the genocide museum. I don't know which was more moving, the news videos of terror, the recorded personal accounts, the skulls in a display case, each with a machete gash testifying as to cause of death, the “before” snapshots of smiling individuals and families celebrating weddings and graduations, victims all, or the rows of children's clothes waiting for wearers who can never return. Mary Eisenhower was with us, granddaughter of the president, and she laid a wreath at the huge tomb of thousands, often still unidentified victims. Few of us had dry eyes.

That wasn't the worst, at least for me. In the countryside there was a Catholic church (most of the population is Catholic) where 10,000 people took refuge during the slaughter. Their priest walked away, abandoning them. When the killers broke in, they began to machine gun and hack until nobody was left alive. A statue of the virgin was damaged by deliberate gunfire, the walls and roof peppered with holes from bullets; the altar cloth, once white, is still there bearing the dark brown stains of blood. The guide, a zombie-eyed woman survivor who has made it her life's work to tend the church and remember the unnamed dead still contained in its crypt, pointed to a row of dark stains along one wall, about a foot from the floor. “The killers returned the next day to see if anybody had survived, but they found only infants trying to suckle from their dead mothers' breasts. They picked them up by the feet and dashed their heads against that wall.”

And I lost it. I'm not a particularly religious woman, but I've never doubted the existence of God. Somehow  I've always managed to rationalize this belief with the knowledge of great evil in the world. Now however, I found myself furiously angry with God, angrier than I've ever been. Not just because such atrocities happened, but that there's no guarantee they won't happen again – or that I myself don't get caught up in the streaming propaganda and fear and reach for my machete. How could a God of love, I raged, give us free will knowing how imperfect we are? Who, calling themselves a loving parent, gives her child an AK47 and says, “It's your choice whether you use it or not”? I don't know what the answer is, or even if there *is* an answer, but the Rwandans are wisely not wasting time trying to find it. Instead, they're moving on with the work of healing and reconciliation.

The way forward, they decided, did not begin by trying to forget the past. Instead, they decided to remember it in all its horror. They computed that it would take them three hundred years to process legally all the accused genocide criminals in prison – obviously not an acceptable option. The real leaders of the atrocities were assigned to spend their full sentences behind bars. The foot soldiers, those who got caught up in the action but are also guilty, were given a chance to express contrition. If they did so, they were to be released after serving one third of their sentences in prison, followed by one quarter of the sentence in special education to overcome old hatreds. But they weren't to go scot free. They were sent back to their communities to face the “gacaca,” traditional tribal ways of administering justice. Here, they were confronted by survivors bearing witness to the crimes committed and expected to show remorse and ask for forgiveness of the entire community. The community was given the opportunity to vent anger, sorrow, fear. If the perpetrators were judged – by the same community – sincere, their penalty  was to spend the rest of their sentence making amends to their victims: building houses, tending fields, all for no pay. If they failed to do this, prison awaited. At the end of their sentence, if all went well, they were allowed their own plot of land on which to build a little house and accepted back into the community, survivors, returning exiles and perpetrators living side by side. In the meantime, all involved no matter their role were given intensive and ongoing counseling and education, tools to get beyond the atrocity and forge a new nation, not composed of Tutsis and Hutus, but Rwandans.

Breathtaking in its compassionate wisdom! But perhaps foolhardy? No one can say for certain yet what the final outcome will be, and certainly no one I met was making confident statements about the future. There are, after all, still rebels lurking across the border in the forests of Congo. Yet it seems to me that the Rwandans have taken the one road leading out of Hell, and if they succeed they'll be able to teach some important lessons to the rest of this suffering world.

Aug. 10th, 2007

book cover

NEW BOOKS and NASFIC

Golden Gryphon Press introduced my collection of lingster stories at the NASFIC in St Louis, Missouri, at the beginning of the month. It was very exciting – and also a bit tiring! – to sit with them in the Dealers' Room and sign the boxes of pre-orders as well as the copies sold right there. Of course it's worth it, and I have to admit I loved handling my first hardback. GG did a fantastic job; the paper they used by itself would make the book a handsome addition to anybody's library. Now I have to hope the stories live up to the beauty of this edition in pleasing the reader!

NASFIC was enjoyable, the usual traveling party that cons become for writers and fans, but I, like most participants I spoke with, was poorly scheduled. On Thursday I had seven events (I'd asked for no more than three per day), and four of them were back to back with no time for lunch or bathroom trips. They also had me down for three panels on Sunday after I'd left to return home. I've since had emails from fans about their disappointment when they showed up for the panels and I didn't; I hate to do that to people, but again I had no choice. The con had decided to make changes to the program at the convention not before – and of course, the program was printed up by then. The best panel was a big eight-panelists affair on the topic “Is There a Place for God in Science Fiction.?” Gene Wolfe was on that one, and I moderated. We had opinions that ran the gamut from “Of course!” to “No way!” (from an announced atheist). There was also a productive panel on aliens and communication, so I was satisfied to have taken part in significant discussions on two of my favorite subjects. (“Significant discussion” to me means I wrote notes on what was said – it wasn't all things I already knew or had thought about.)

Before the con actually got going, Elizabeth Moon and I braved the heat and the humidity to visit Cahokia, the largest Native American site in North America.. I'd heard about the mounds, but I had no idea they were the site of such a vast metropolis. The museum does a fine job of presenting the culture and history of the site, and there's an interesting movie you shouldn't miss if you go. What always intrigues me when I visit ancient places all across the world is the repetition of sacred symbols and practices one finds. Our distant ancestors carried more than themselves on their migrations out of Africa; they seem to have carried ideas about the transcendent, and ways to express them. In my own fiction, I often wonder whether we'll find correspondences with other cultures across the galaxy, especially spiritual ones. I don't believe we're alone in the universe, and I don't think we'll turn out to be the only ones who've speculated long and hard about a creator.

Now that I'm home, it's back to work. I've started on a new lingster novel, this one set in the very far future when the center of the Guild is no longer on Earth. I won't say any more than that for fear of jinxing my writing. I had a long period of not writing much and losing confidence in what I did write, so I'm going to keep this one to myself until it's fully hatched. But I will say that this lingster story is going to involve the roots of language and a search for God – but then, don't they all?

[And a postscript:]
My greyhound is doing better; the specialists have discontinued the meds, all except prednisone which we're tapering down. But we aren't out of the woods yet. Yesterday, the vet phoned me to say Jack's exit blood test showed his white cell count was low, so we need to monitor it for a couple of weeks. It could be a side-effect of the extreme antibiotics he was taking, but then again it might be a sign that the bug hasn't completely given up. The specialists determined it was a tick-borne disease, but which one still eludes them. It's none of the usual suspects, nor is it a couple of the exotics. Keep your fingers crossed for Jack, please.